The official "Hey, Stout - it's another remake!" thread

[Stout]

I saw the trailer for the new House of Wax, and it didn't look that at all like the original. Remember, a lot of "remakes" basically borrow the premise of its source material, like Stout pointed out about Shakespeare. A lot of the horror remakes fall into that category, like House On Haunted Hill or Thirteen Ghosts. Ocassionally, a movie actually does do justice for it's original, like the new Dawn of the Dead, which I thought was going to really be bad, but it was actually better than I thought it would be. But then, for every Dawn of the Dead, there's a The Haunting.

A remake for House of Wax??? AAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

[Brian in Mesa]

A remake for House of Wax??? AAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!

In the remake, not kidding: Paris Hilton.

 

[Stout]

In the remake, not kidding: Paris Hilton.

Oh, okay...I was worried there for a second. Must be some kind of 'House of Waxin' Dat Azz' or some corny porn ripoff. Not real cinema at all. That's one of her stipulations, right--that a project can't have any real cinematic value?

 

[Brian in Mesa]

Oh, okay...I was worried there for a second. Must be some kind of 'House of Waxin' Dat Azz' or some corny porn ripoff. Not real cinema at all. That's one of her stipulations, right--that a project can't have any real cinematic value?

 

[Chaplin]

Oh, okay...I was worried there for a second. Must be some kind of 'House of Waxin' Dat Azz' or some corny porn ripoff. Not real cinema at all. That's one of her stipulations, right--that a project can't have any real cinematic value?

The trailer made it look to be more like the new Texas Chainsaw Massacre than the original House of Wax. The original concentrated on the Vincent Price character a lot--this one is more like the standard horror movies of today--concentrate on the victims rather than the killer. And the shots of Paris actually looked like she was playing it straight.

It does have Kim Bauer (Elisha Cuthbert) as the main character though, so we can only hope there are no stray cougars, but there will most likely be a stray insane mountain man somewhere.

 

[Brian in Mesa]

The trailer made it look to be more like the new Texas Chainsaw Massacre than the original House of Wax.

Which reminds me...before he remakes The Hitcher, Michael Bay is making a prequel to the remake of The Texas Chainsaw Massacre which came out last year.

 

[Brian in Mesa]

Ice Cube to Play Mr. Blandings
Source: Variety
February 22, 2005

Revolution Studios is in talks with Ice Cube to play the title character in a remake of Cary Grant 1948 comedy Mr. Blandings Builds His Dream House, says Variety. Cube's Next Friday director, Steve Carr, will helm the movie this summer.

The original starred Grant and Myrna Loy as a couple that chucks their Manhattan apartment for a big house in the suburbs. The fixer-upper proves to be a nightmare.

Cube just toplined Revolution comedy Are We There Yet? and next stars in the studio's action sequel XXX: State of the Union, which opens April 29.

Carr, who previously directed Daddy Day Care, just completed the Martin Lawrence starrer Rebound for Fox.

 

[Brian in Mesa]

Nicolas Cage's Next is The Wicker Man
Source: Variety
March 4, 2005

Nicolas Cage's next picture will be director Neil LaBute's remake of 1973 thriller The Wicker Man, with Millennium Films, Equity Pictures and Emmett/Furla Films producing, reports Variety.

LaBute adapted the screenplay, in which a sheriff investigates the disappearance of a young girl on a remote island off the coast of Maine. His hopes of unraveling the girl's disappearance become increasingly uncertain when he discovers evidence of pagan rituals.

The movie will begin production July 15 in Vancouver.

 

[Stout]

Nicolas Cage's Next is The Wicker Man
Source: Variety
March 4, 2005

Nicolas Cage's next picture will be director Neil LaBute's remake of 1973 thriller The Wicker Man, with Millennium Films, Equity Pictures and Emmett/Furla Films producing, reports Variety.

LaBute adapted the screenplay, in which a sheriff investigates the disappearance of a young girl on a remote island off the coast of Maine. His hopes of unraveling the girl's disappearance become increasingly uncertain when he discovers evidence of pagan rituals.

The movie will begin production July 15 in Vancouver.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

These bastards!!! They've finally done it! They've finally gone too far!!! Not only do they have to remake THE WICKER MAN, but they make NICK CAGE the frickin' lead actor!?!?!?!?

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

[Chaplin]

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

These bastards!!! They've finally done it! They've finally gone too far!!! Not only do they have to remake THE WICKER MAN, but they make NICK CAGE the frickin' lead actor!?!?!?!?

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I do agree. That's just stupid.

 

[mdamien13]

It does have Kim Bauer (Elisha Cuthbert) as the main character though, so we can only hope there are no stray cougars, but there will most likely be a stray insane mountain man somewhere.

Awesome!!!

House of Wax is being remade by Dark Castle Productions, which is a company devoted to remakes of William Castle flicks (House on Haunted Hill, 13 Ghosts) although they did do two "originals" (Ghost Ship, something w/ Halle Berry). While I liked House on Haunted Hill, I think their track record should indicate what to expect from this House of Wax remake - although the thought of seeing Paris Hilton butchered will get me in the door (where else do you get to see a hack get hacked up?)

I agree that Wicker Man is a pointless remake. The original is an incredible film with an ending that has stayed with me through the years. Christopher Lee is still alive, I wonder if they'll approach him to reprise his role?

 

[Brian in Mesa]

Brad Anderson in Talks for The Crazies
Source: Fangoria
March 5, 2005

Scott Kosar, screenwriter of Paramount's The Crazies, tells Fangoria that the studio is in talks with Brad Anderson to direct the remake of George Romero's horror-thriller. Anderson and Kosar last teamed-up for The Machinist, which starred Christian Bale.

"I don't know if it's going to happen just yet, but they're talking about it," said Kosar, "My producers really loved 'The Machinist' and Brad is super-talented, and they think we have good creative energy together, which we do."

The film will update the storyline of the 1972 original, in which inhabitants of a small Pennsylvania town are beset by death and insanity after a plane crash lets loose a secret biological weapon into the water supply.

Kosar's credits include New Line's The Texas Chainsaw Massacre and MGM/Dimension's upcoming remake of The Amityville Horror.

 

[Brian in Mesa]

Swiss Family Robinson Washes Ashore
Source: Production Weekly
March 7, 2005

Disney-based Mandeville Films (The Shaggy Dog (remake)) will start production on a new Swiss Family Robinson feature in September at the Queenslands Warner Roadshow Studios.

The film will be set in its original time period, around the beginning of the 19th century. The script was written by Greg Poirier.

The classic story, based on a novel by Johann David Wyss, finds the Robinson family washed ashore on an uncharted tropical island following a stormy shipwreck.

The 1960 original starred John Mills and Dorothy McGuire.

 

[Chaplin]

Swiss Family Robinson Washes Ashore
Source: Production Weekly
March 7, 2005

Disney-based Mandeville Films (The Shaggy Dog (remake)) will start production on a new Swiss Family Robinson feature in September at the Queenslands Warner Roadshow Studios.

The film will be set in its original time period, around the beginning of the 19th century. The script was written by Greg Poirier.

The classic story, based on a novel by Johann David Wyss, finds the Robinson family washed ashore on an uncharted tropical island following a stormy shipwreck.

The 1960 original starred John Mills and Dorothy McGuire.

Technically, this could be classified as an adaptation, rather than a remake.

 

[Brian in Mesa]

From HSBR.NET:

Last Holiday ... Queen Latifah stars in the remake of the 1950 comedy Last Holiday. Playing a character originated by Alec Guinness, Latifah is a shy sales clerk who finds out she is going to die. With nothing to lose, she goes to a European resort, loses her inhibitions, and engages in outrageous and cheeky behavior. The script for the Paramount remake is by Peter Seaman and Jeffrey Price.

 

[Chaplin]

From HSBR.NET:

Last Holiday ... Queen Latifah stars in the remake of the 1950 comedy Last Holiday. Playing a character originated by Alec Guinness, Latifah is a shy sales clerk who finds out she is going to die. With nothing to lose, she goes to a European resort, loses her inhibitions, and engages in outrageous and cheeky behavior. The script for the Paramount remake is by Peter Seaman and Jeffrey Price.

Sounds like a comedic version of Ikiru. Brilliant film for the Kurosawa-impaired.

 

[Brian in Mesa]

When Worlds Collide

 

[Brian in Mesa]

When A Stranger Calls

 

[Brian in Mesa]

The Birds Take Flight Again
Source: The Hollywood Reporter
April 26, 2005

Universal is planning on remaking Alfred Hitchcock's 1963 horror classic The Birds with Michael Bay's Platinum Dunes in talks to produce with Peter Guber through his Mandalay Pictures banner.

The Hollywood Reporter says the new version would be based on the short story by Daphne Du Maurier, to which Universal owns the rights and which inspired Hitchcock's movie. Tippi Hedren starred in the original thriller about increasingly vicious birds that terrorize a small town.

Universal has previously remade Hitchcock's Psycho with director Gus Van Sant in 1998. A Strangers on a Train redo is also in the works at Warner Bros. Pictures, which released A Perfect Murder - based on the play that inspired Hitchcock's Dial M for Murder - in 1998.

 

[Stout]

The Birds Take Flight Again
Source: The Hollywood Reporter
April 26, 2005

Universal is planning on remaking Alfred Hitchcock's 1963 horror classic The Birds with Michael Bay's Platinum Dunes in talks to produce with Peter Guber through his Mandalay Pictures banner.

The Hollywood Reporter says the new version would be based on the short story by Daphne Du Maurier, to which Universal owns the rights and which inspired Hitchcock's movie. Tippi Hedren starred in the original thriller about increasingly vicious birds that terrorize a small town.

Universal has previously remade Hitchcock's Psycho with director Gus Van Sant in 1998. A Strangers on a Train redo is also in the works at Warner Bros. Pictures, which released A Perfect Murder - based on the play that inspired Hitchcock's Dial M for Murder - in 1998.

Jaysus

 

[Brian in Mesa]

All of Me

 

[Brian in Mesa]

John Woo Remaking French Thrillers
Source: Variety
May 11, 2005

John Woo and Terence Chang's Lion Rock Productions has teamed with France's StudioCanal to develop modern-day remakes of three vintage French thrillers, reports Variety.

The films are Honor Among Thieves (1968 ), starring Charles Bronson and Alain Delon; Rider on the Rain (1969), with Bronson and Marlene Jobert; and The Prone Gunman (1982), featuring Delon as a hitman.

The films will be packaged as "The Thriller Collection," which could grow to include further remakes from StudioCanal's 3,000-strong movie library.

Woo said he may direct "Thieves," which is expected to go into production later this year, himself. His next film will be Paramount's remake of 1970's The Red Circle. After that, he plans to helm Chinese historical epic The Battle of the Red Cliff, based on true events from 203 A.D.A.D.

Woo recently left Universal's Spy-Hunter project over scheduling conflicts.

 

[Brian in Mesa]

Obst and Disney Plan More Babysitting
Source: Variety
May 27, 2005

Variety reports that Lynda Obst and Walt Disney Pictures are planning a remake of the comedy Adventures in Babysitting and have hired the writing team of Hilary Galanoy and Elizabeth Hackett to pen the new script.

The 1987 original was written by David Simkins and was the feature directorial debut of helmer Chris Columbus. Obst and the late Debra Hill produced for Disney's Touchstone label.

Elizabeth Shue starred as a suburban high-school senior whose dull night of babysitting is interrupted by a call for help from a friend stuck downtown.

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Why?! Why?! Why?!

Make a sequel or a similar movie by another name, but why remake THIS movie?

I like this movie and see no need for a remake.

C'mon Hollywood!!

 

[Stout]

Obst and Disney Plan More Babysitting
Source: Variety
May 27, 2005

Variety reports that Lynda Obst and Walt Disney Pictures are planning a remake of the comedy Adventures in Babysitting and have hired the writing team of Hilary Galanoy and Elizabeth Hackett to pen the new script.

The 1987 original was written by David Simkins and was the feature directorial debut of helmer Chris Columbus. Obst and the late Debra Hill produced for Disney's Touchstone label.

Elizabeth Shue starred as a suburban high-school senior whose dull night of babysitting is interrupted by a call for help from a friend stuck downtown.

------------------------------------------

Why?! Why?! Why?!

Make a sequel or a similar movie by another name, but why remake THIS movie?

I like this movie and see no need for a remake.

C'mon Hollywood!!

What an f-ing stupid idea.

Wait, I've got a good one...let's remake...wait for it...wait for it...wait for it...























Jaws!

 

[Brian in Mesa]

Piranha