Solving Cards’ stadium name game
By Scott Bordow, Tribune Columnist
November 15, 2005
A rose by any other name would smell as sweet — William Shakespeare.
Obviously, Sir William never heard of the Poulan Weedeater Independence Bowl.
Just what was the trophy for that game, anyway? A gold-plated weed-whacker? Did the loser go home with bronzed goggles?
Not that I mind. I’m long past the point where corporate sponsorship of sporting events or venues gets my blood boiling. It’s part of the culture, and screaming about it is like calling for an end to the Bowl Championship Series.
It’s a waste of breath.
Heck, I didn’t even have a problem when Major League Baseball agreed to put Spider-Man 2 logos on its bases to promote the movie.
Baseball eventually relented in the face of public criticism, and I couldn’t figure out why. There’s advertising on the outfield walls and in the dugouts. Why are the bases sacrosanct?
Besides, it’s not like a picture of Spidey was going to destroy baseball’s integrity. Steroids already had done that, thank you.
OK, we get it. You’re a corporate shill. What’s the point?
Geez, take a Kodak moment, will you? It’s just that we’re inundated with name changes here in the Valley. First, Bank One Ballpark became Chase Field. That was OK with me, even though Chase Field doesn’t have a catchy acronym like BOB.
At least it wasn’t named after orange juice or a pet store.
But now America West Arena has been renamed US Airways Center, in light of the merger between the two airlines. US Airways Center? That’s not a basketball arena. That’s an airplane hangar. Besides, it’s too confusing. There’s already a US Airways Arena in Maryland. Here’s a better choice: It’s-A-Five-Hour-Flight-Have-Some-Roasted-Peanuts Arena. You’d remember that.
Anyway, the loss of AWA and BOB got me to thinking. (I do that from time to time.)
Why don’t the Coyotes have a corporate sponsor attached to Glendale Arena? And what might the Cardinals call their new stadium? (Insert joke here. You know you want to.)
I called Doug Moss, the Coyotes’ president, chief operating officer and alternate governor — that must be one long nameplate — and he said the franchise hopes to have a sponsor on board before the end of the season.
He didn’t tell me what companies the Coyotes are negotiating with. Maybe that’s because I didn’t care enough to ask.
"We’re not really looking to rush into anything," Moss said. "We’re more determined to have the right deal."
Oh, please. Just ask Wayne Gretzky what he wants and put it on the building. That’s how things work over there.
As for the Cardinals, they could chase the almighty dollar, but I think they should buck the corporate trend and go for the personal touch.
Before the evil-doers at Qualcomm bought a city’s soul, the San Diego
Chargers’ home was named Jack Murphy Stadium, in honor of a longtime local sportswriter. What a great idea. The Cardinals should name their new home after the person who’s suffered through more of their games than anyone else.
Me.
We’ll call it the Bordome.
The Bidwills are going to want rights fees, so I hereby pledge $100 for every game they win the rest of the season. I know that’s not much, but think of the prestige, the honor, the absolute joy of having their stadium named after such a legendary figure.
Besides, it’s not like the Cardinals are going to get a better offer.
By Scott Bordow, Tribune Columnist
November 15, 2005
A rose by any other name would smell as sweet — William Shakespeare.
Obviously, Sir William never heard of the Poulan Weedeater Independence Bowl.
Just what was the trophy for that game, anyway? A gold-plated weed-whacker? Did the loser go home with bronzed goggles?
Not that I mind. I’m long past the point where corporate sponsorship of sporting events or venues gets my blood boiling. It’s part of the culture, and screaming about it is like calling for an end to the Bowl Championship Series.
It’s a waste of breath.
Heck, I didn’t even have a problem when Major League Baseball agreed to put Spider-Man 2 logos on its bases to promote the movie.
Baseball eventually relented in the face of public criticism, and I couldn’t figure out why. There’s advertising on the outfield walls and in the dugouts. Why are the bases sacrosanct?
Besides, it’s not like a picture of Spidey was going to destroy baseball’s integrity. Steroids already had done that, thank you.
OK, we get it. You’re a corporate shill. What’s the point?
Geez, take a Kodak moment, will you? It’s just that we’re inundated with name changes here in the Valley. First, Bank One Ballpark became Chase Field. That was OK with me, even though Chase Field doesn’t have a catchy acronym like BOB.
At least it wasn’t named after orange juice or a pet store.
But now America West Arena has been renamed US Airways Center, in light of the merger between the two airlines. US Airways Center? That’s not a basketball arena. That’s an airplane hangar. Besides, it’s too confusing. There’s already a US Airways Arena in Maryland. Here’s a better choice: It’s-A-Five-Hour-Flight-Have-Some-Roasted-Peanuts Arena. You’d remember that.
Anyway, the loss of AWA and BOB got me to thinking. (I do that from time to time.)
Why don’t the Coyotes have a corporate sponsor attached to Glendale Arena? And what might the Cardinals call their new stadium? (Insert joke here. You know you want to.)
I called Doug Moss, the Coyotes’ president, chief operating officer and alternate governor — that must be one long nameplate — and he said the franchise hopes to have a sponsor on board before the end of the season.
He didn’t tell me what companies the Coyotes are negotiating with. Maybe that’s because I didn’t care enough to ask.
"We’re not really looking to rush into anything," Moss said. "We’re more determined to have the right deal."
Oh, please. Just ask Wayne Gretzky what he wants and put it on the building. That’s how things work over there.
As for the Cardinals, they could chase the almighty dollar, but I think they should buck the corporate trend and go for the personal touch.
Before the evil-doers at Qualcomm bought a city’s soul, the San Diego
Chargers’ home was named Jack Murphy Stadium, in honor of a longtime local sportswriter. What a great idea. The Cardinals should name their new home after the person who’s suffered through more of their games than anyone else.
Me.
We’ll call it the Bordome.
The Bidwills are going to want rights fees, so I hereby pledge $100 for every game they win the rest of the season. I know that’s not much, but think of the prestige, the honor, the absolute joy of having their stadium named after such a legendary figure.
Besides, it’s not like the Cardinals are going to get a better offer.
