Swan Songs: The Best & Worst TV Series Finales: Worst

KingLouieLouie

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I thought this was an interesting read, especially since we discussed some of these finales on this forum.... I really disagree about their comments on
M*A*S*H* though....

http://entertainment.msn.com/news/article.aspx?news=158612


nless you've been living in a cave with your eyes closed and your fingers stuck in your ears, you know that "Friends" has bid a fond farewell to Must-See TV, never to be heard from again except for those thrice-daily reruns.

No, it wasn't the best episode ever, and yeah, we only laughed once (kudos to you, Matthew Perry), but it deserves props for giving fans the ending they wanted and deserved: Ross and Rachel reconciled, Monica and Chandler the parents of twins, Phoebe happily settled, and Joey starring in his very own spin-off.

(Story Continues Below...)





Series finales are a tricky business -- what works for one show might be disastrous for another. See, we viewers are a loyal bunch. We get emotionally invested in our favorite characters, who we've probably spent more time with than our own friends and families. Not only do we want them to have a fitting send-off, with plenty of laughter and tears, just like the network promos promise, but we want closure, or at least the closest thing to closure you can get with people who don't actually exist.

So with "Friends," "Frasier" and "The Practice" gone, and "Angel" ready to sign off, we've picked five shows that got their goodbyes right -- and five that should be relegated to the couch potato hall of shame.

First, the worst...

WORST

5. "X-Files," The Truth (May 19, 2002)

You want the truth? Apparently creator Chris Carter thought viewers couldn't handle the truth -- at least not all of it. The convoluted two-hour finale not only wastes time recapping the previous eight seasons, but it annoyingly clears up some major plot points off screen. FBI agent Fox Mulder (the returning David Duchovny) is put on trial for murder, but soon goes on the lam with sorta girlfriend/"miracle"-baby mama Scully (Gillian Anderson). Faster than you can say "trust no one," he chats up the ghosts of the Lone Gunmen and confronts Cigarette Smoking Man, who reveals the truth: the alien invasion is scheduled for Dec. 22, 2012. A date. That's it. That's all we get (well, that and CSM dies -- again). At least fans got a nice little bit of continuity at the end, when Mulder and Scully play snugglebunnies at a Roswell motel in homage to the first episode. "Maybe there's hope," says Mulder. Or maybe there are still so many unanswered questions that fans will fork over their cash for the second installment of the big screen "X-Files" franchise, which is in development.

4. "Seinfeld," The Finale (May 14, 1998)

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For Jerry, George (Jason Alexander), Elaine (Julia Louis-Dreyfus), and Kramer (Michael Richards), the end of their nine-year run amounted to so much yadda yadda yadda. Granted, after NBC's frenzied promotion of the Larry David-penned episode, expectations were higher than Elaine's hair -- and impossible to fulfill. But the existential, self-referential 75-minute conclusion, in which the not-so-fab four are sentenced to a year in jail for failing to aid a portly carjacking victim, left us utterly unsatisfied. The show about nothing had tried to make a point about something -- and it paid the price in laughter. And yet, we still agonized over whether it deserved to be on the worst list, mostly due to its steadfast refusal to break from its guiding philosophy: "No hugging. No learning." Even after they're confronted by the many people they've wronged, from Babu to the Bubble Boy, our anti-heroes are still the same petty, selfish, minutiae-obsessed people they've always been. How do we know? Jailbird Jerry needles George about the buttons on his shirt, just as he did in the pilot episode.

3. "St. Elsewhere" -- "The Last One" (May 25, 1988)

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Fans of the medical drama received a nasty surprise in the final episode, which probably should have just faded out with the dedicated staff at St. Eligius hospital saying their farewells. In the last scene, we see Dr. Westphall's son Tommy (Chad Allen) sitting on the floor of a dingy living room staring at a St. Eligius snow globe. Turns out Dr. Westphall (Ed Flanders) isn't an M.D. -- he's a construction worker, and Dr. Auschlander (Norman Lloyd), who died earlier in the episode, is now alive (and also not a physician). "I just don't understand this autism thing, Pop," Westphall tells Auschlander as he puts the globe on top of the TV (ah, such symbolism). "He sits there all day long in his own little world, staring at that toy. What's he think about?" Get it? The six years the audience invested in the hospital staff's trials and tribulations were nothing more than the feverish imagination of an autistic child. Mind-blowing, huh? It's just too bad all those betrayed viewers couldn't sue for malpractice.

2. "Roseanne" -- "Into That Good Night" (May 20, 1997)

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It was a demoralizing end for the ferociously funny blue-collar Connor clan. In its final season, the once-groundbreaking sitcom had come under Roseanne's control and grown bloated with bad ideas sold as satire. The family wins the lottery; patriarch Dan (John Goodman) has a heart attack and leaves Roseanne for another woman; Roseanne mingles with the rich and famous and battles terrorists on a train. The coup de grace? In the finale's closing moments, we learn through Roseanne's somber voiceover that everything that had come before (not just the previous season but everything) was a novel written by Roseanne after Dan died of a heart attack. In the new "Roseanne" world order, Jackie is a lesbian, Darlene is married to Mark, and Becky to David. Say what? But even worse than the unraveling of a family we had come to know was the New Age sentiment behind it. ''I learned that no one could stop me but me,'' explains Roseanne. ''I learned that love is stronger than hate. And most important, I learned that God does exist. He and/or She is right inside you, underneath the pain, the sorrow, and the shame." Especially the shame of a lousy last episode.

1. "M*A*S*H*" -- "Goodbye, Farewell and Amen" (Feb. 28, 1983)

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We know, we know, there are lots of you out there who think the two-and-a-half-hour finale is pure genius, but we think after 10-and-a-half increasingly sentimental seasons, the still top-rated show had lost the plot -- literally. In the syrupy, self-righteous swan song, earnest Everyman surgeon Hawkeye Pierce (Alan Alda, who co-wrote and directed) suffers a nervous breakdown after witnessing a mother smother her baby on a bus. He recovers and returns to the 4077th in time for the war to end. Tears, manly hugs, and more tears build up to the big heart-tugging conclusion. As Hawkeye's helicopter takes off, he sees that best bud B.J. (Mike Farrell) has spelled out "goodbye" in stones on the ground. Someone give us a schmaltz-ectomy -- stat! Still, 106 million people tuned in for the pop-culture event (it's still the all-time ratings champ), many of whom we expect will write in to tell us just how wrong we are.
 
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KingLouieLouie

KingLouieLouie

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http://entertainment.msn.com/tv/article.aspx?news=158613

Swan Songs: The Best & Worst TV Series Finales

BEST

5. "The Larry Sanders Show" -- "Flip" (May 31, 1998)

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In this unsentimental end to the brilliantly cynical comedy, late night talk show host Larry Sanders (Garry Shandling) is about to be replaced by the hipper Jon Stewart. Determined to have a send-off on par with Johnny Carson, Larry tries to corral top-notch guests. As in every other episode, bile, bitterness, backstabbing and biting wit ensue. Stand-out moments include David Duchovny re-enacting the leg-crossing scene in "Basic Instinct" for a horrified Larry and Jim Carrey tenderly serenading the host on air with "And I Am Telling You I'm Not Going," only to eviscerate him during a commercial break.

(Story Continues Below...)



"Let's just cut the crap, Larry, OK? You never liked my work until I got hugely famous," snits Carrey, who says if he didn't have a movie to promote, he'd be home watching "'Nightline' ... as usual." You almost feel sorry for the neurotic, self-absorbed Larry when he says his final goodbyes and realizes just how empty his life will now be. "I don't know exactly what I'm going to do without you," he tells the crowd. But even his pathos is tainted, as he interrupts his post-show meltdown to wonder about the competition: "I hope we beat Leno."


4. "The Fugitive" -- "The Judgment" (Aug. 29, 1967)

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If you've seen the blockbuster Harrison Ford movie (or even the lame Tim Daly TV rehash), you know the plot: After Dr. Richard Kimble is falsely accused of murdering his wife, he escapes from custody and sets out to prove that a one-armed man committed the crime. Despite objections from worried network execs, who feared that concluding the series would cut into syndication revenue, Kimble's (David Janssen) four years on the run came to a thrilling end as he confronted the one-armed man (Bill Raisch) on top of a water tower in a deserted amusement park. Just as he's about to toss Kimble to his death, the killer 'fesses up, only to be shot by the relentless Lt. Gerard (Barry Morse). Kimble walks away a free if emotionally scarred man in this pioneering finale, which became the highest-rated TV episode of the time.

3. "Cheers" -- "One for the Road" (May 20, 1993)

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The endlessly hyped 98-minute conclusion to the sitcom's 11-season run gave closure to everyone, especially the 80-plus million viewers who tuned in. Dysfunctional lovebirds Sam (Ted Danson) and Diane (Shelley Long) reconnect and decide to marry, only to realize just how wrong they are for one another; dim-witted Woody (Woody Harrelson) becomes a Boston councilman; gold-digging Rebecca (Kirstie Alley) marries a plumber; barfly Norm (George Wendt) becomes gainfully employed; and hapless mailman Cliff (John Ratzenberger) is promoted. While the episode, penned by creators Glen and Les Charles, aimed more for yuks than tears, it does have its moments. "Funny," Frasier (Kelsey Grammer) says. "Time goes by so fast. People move in and out of our lives. You must never miss an opportunity to tell people what they mean to you." In the end, Sam returns to Cheers, the place Norm calls "his one true love." As he turns off the lights, he tells a lone customer, "Sorry, we're closed," and in a final, quiet tribute to both Coach and the actor who played him (the late Nicholas Colasanto), Sam stops to straighten the picture of Geronimo on the wall. Awwww.

2. "The Mary Tyler Moore Show" -- "The Last Show" (March 19, 1977)

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When low-rated WJM-TV is bought out, the entire crew -- spunky Mary Richards (Mary Tyler Moore), gruff teddy bear Lou Grant (Ed Asner), nebbishy newswriter Murray Slaughter (Gavin MacLeod), hot-blooded Sue Anne Nivens (Betty White) -- is unceremoniously canned. The only survivor: dim-witted blowhard anchorman Ted Baxter (Ted Knight). As the incomparable cast gathers for a final heartbreaking group hug, Mary tells them, "Thank you for being my family." Sniff. A need for Kleenex results in the group moving en masse to Mary's desk and finally marching out the door singing "It's a Long, Long Way to Tipperary," which Ted had earlier -- and uproariously -- saluted them with on the air. Before she leaves, Mary takes one last wistful look around the newsroom and turns off the lights. After 186 episodes, the funny and touching three-hanky finish was the perfect adieu for the iconic ensemble comedy, and it deservedly won an Emmy for Best Comedy Writing.

1. "Newhart" -- "The Last Newhart" (May 21, 1990)

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It was Bob Newhart's real-life wife who came up with the sitcom's surreal-icious "Dallas"-inspired denouement. Innkeepers Dick Loudon (Newhart) and wife Joanna (Mary Frann) are Stratford's lone holdouts when a Japanese mogul buys out the town and turns it into a golf resort. Cut to five years later, and the former residents (including Larry, his brother Daryl and his other brother Daryl, both of whom utter their first and only word of the series, telling their chatty wives, "Quiet!") gather for a reunion. After Dick is bonked on the head by a golf ball, he wakes up in -- surprise! -- his old "Bob Newhart Show" bed next to his former TV wife Emily (Suzanne Pleshette), eager to tell her about the nightmare he just had. "Well, I was an innkeeper in this crazy little town in Vermont," says bewildered shrink Bob Hartley. "Nothing made sense in this place. I mean, the maid was an heiress. Her husband talked in alliteration. The handyman kept missing the point of things. And then there were these three woodsmen..."
 

Pariah

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So many of these "final-final" shows are more for the casts than for the audience. Friends and Cheers are perfect examples of that.
 

SirStefan32

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X- Files finale was horrible. Angel was even worse tonight, though Spike was quite funny. Buffy was the only show I really like that had a decent finale- at least there was some closure there.
 

Chaplin

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SirStefan32 said:
X- Files finale was horrible. Angel was even worse tonight, though Spike was quite funny. Buffy was the only show I really like that had a decent finale- at least there was some closure there.

Are you high? Angel was actually pretty good--and ended at a high note.
 

SirStefan32

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Actually, I was semi- drunk, and pissed that Angel was going off the air. It was a decent finale, but it happened too quickly, and we still don't know what really happened. It felt like part 1 of the two- part finale.
 

WaywardFan

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Nah, the Angel series finale is exactly the type of finale Joss does. I'm fine with how it ended, because it doesn't end. It leaves open movies, novels and fanfic.

Really, its a good way to deal with it. The battle against evil doesn't end.

Stefan, I wanna party with you!
 

SirStefan32

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Well, I'm thinking about having an election day party or something, and you're not too far away, so maybe we can get together. By the way, my friends are addicted to Buffy and Angel, so there will be many parties.

Didn't know you were an Angel/ Buffy fan. That's pretty cool. :thumbup:

Sir
 

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