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Ladies and Gentlemen of the press, thank you for coming by today.
Yesterday, our campaign was rocked by a scandal when our speechwriter, Linderbee, had a change of heart and left our team to join DotKen's. We regret her decision, and wish her well. However, this has brought a few things to light.
1. The Laker issue.
Yes, I am a Laker fan there is nothing to deny there. I've never tried to hide it or keep it a secret. I am not the only one however. And I'm not the only member of this board that likes a team outside of Arizona. There are many Cardinals fans who also cheer for the St. Louis Cardinals. There are Seahawk fans who are great contributors to our board, like our friend MigratingOsprey over there. Why, there is in-fighting among several of our posters as to the better teams between ASU and UofA! It is our diversity that makes this board great. We don't all believe the same and we don't all agree.
A diverse and vibrant population on this board keeps us checking in each day. We have Darksiders and Kool-Aiders on the Cards forum, we have posters in the Suns forum who disagree over Nash's playing time. We have a Smack Shack where everyone can let off steam. We have a P & R board where agreeing is rare but the fighting can be glorious. We have Everything Else which is our Comedy Central. Our Diamondbacks section is top notch. And several other great sections of this board from tech issues to for sale sections, and college sports to food, movies and TV forums. Our great board is not built on everyone sharing the same opinion, but on celebrating our differences as well as those things we have in common.
My staff and I don't even agree on every issue. My running mate, Mulli, doesn't share my Laker feelings and my fantastic, highly intelligent Chief of Staff Jenna is an enormous Suns fan. But we have common goals that we share, and we know that petty differences of opinion only make us stronger and with our ability to balance each other out we can make a better ASFN, one that doesn't discriminate posters who may not worship every single Arizona team. ASFN is for everyone even those we do not agree with. Or should we ask for proof of being a Cardinals fan before you can go to a Suns game? This is a slippery slope, and one I don't care to tread. I am an inclusive candidate, and I do not discriminate.
2. The vicious mudslinging that has been going on recently is getting out of hand. This new opponent, Jason, is running on a campaign of a lie. He claims he will become Pariah if he wins but what trust are we to give him, this newcomer named Jason?
I have only one thing to say regarding this campaign platform of his: Jason, I posted with Pariah: I knew Pariah; Pariah was a friend of mine. Jason, you are no Pariah. And before you complain about this, Jason, you are the one that is making the comparison — and I'm one who knew him well. And frankly I think you and Pariah are so far apart in the objectives you choose for your posts that I did not think the comparison was well-taken.
Thank you, members of the press. Any further questions will be answered by jenna.
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The vicious mudslinging that has been going on recently is getting out of hand. This new opponent, Jason, is running on a campaign of a lie. He claims he will become Pariah if he wins
In one breath DDogg claims the "mudslinging is getting out of hand," and then proceeds to sling mud.
My campaign is based on this fact: I am the only candidate that has the power to create an actual change, to mend the fences that have created a division within the hallowed cyber walls of ASFN. I am the only candidate who can bring Pariah back into the fold.
DDogg can't, and he wants you to believe that I can't either. A vote for Jason is a vote for Pariah; and that, as Pariah might say isn't a promise--it's a threat!
DDogg is correct in that ASFNers are all cut from a different cloth, but we've all agreed on one thing in the past, and I believe we'll all agree on its future: Pariah never should have left our screens. Pariah is due for a return to ASFN!
Pariah is dead. Long live Pariah!
__________________ America cannot have an empire abroad and a Republic at home.
For the record--my issue with D-Dogg, and my inability to endorse him, has nothing to do with the fact that he is not a Suns fan. It is because he is a Lakers fan. There is a big difference here. I could also not endorse (I will have to wash my hands with battery acid after typing this) a Cowboys fan. I celebrate diversity as much as anyone else. (I scored a 12 on the liberal test, remember). It's the LAKERS. I mean, really. The LAKERS. It pains my heart to know that someone I once held in such high esteem has such a dark, dark, ugly side. I do wish you well, D-Dogg, and I appreciate your kind words and your gracious acceptance of my resignation. I just can't support you.
For the record--my issue with D-Dogg, and my inability to endorse him, has nothing to do with the fact that he is not a Suns fan. It is because he is a Lakers fan. There is a big difference here. I could also not endorse (I will have to wash my hands with battery acid after typing this) a Cowboys fan. I celebrate diversity as much as anyone else. (I scored a 12 on the liberal test, remember). It's the LAKERS. I mean, really. The LAKERS. It pains my heart to know that someone I once held in such high esteem has such a dark, dark, ugly side. I do wish you well, D-Dogg, and I appreciate your kind words and your gracious acceptance of my resignation. I just can't support you.
I would understand if I were a Mavs fan as they actually pose a threat to you this year, while the Lakers do not.
I would understand if I were a Mavs fan as they actually pose a threat to you this year, while the Lakers do not.
I'm not a bandwagon team hater. My dissent for the Lakers runs far deeper than anything going on this season. I could still support you if you were a Mavs fan, even.
I read this press release as if it were being read by president palmer on 24. The problem is not that you have ties to another team. Its the fact that that team is the Lakers. The people can't vote for that.
I read this press release as if it were being read by president palmer on 24. The problem is not that you have ties to another team. Its the fact that that team is the Lakers. The people can't vote for that.
If he were a Mavs fan, I could understand. I respect what the Lakers have accomplished. Thank goodness for D-Dogg's sake that he is not a Mavs fan.
Location: on the run from johnny law... ain't no trip to cleveland
Posts: 9,352
A$FN: 1,000
Quote:
Originally Posted by Jason
Does DDogg still beat his puppies?
absolutely. d-dogg is a man of the people. every week he gets out among his constituents and beats his hush puppies until the soles are worn through. he wears those babies thin meeting with his fellow men and truly identifying what it is that makes them tick. he's got his finger on the pulse of the nation, and he is eternally grateful to his puppies for helping him in his journey.
next question, please.
__________________
We all need more Izzard in our life. - Gaddabout
I'll try to be more observant from now on. - dogpoo32
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