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Old January 5th, 2006, 09:21 AM   #1
40yearfan
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Student book report----


Students were assigned to read 2 books, "Titanic" & "My Life" by Bill Clinton. One smart-ass student turned in the following book report, with the proposition that they were nearly identical stories! His cool professor gave him an A+ for this report:



Titanic:..... $29.99

Clinton:..... $29.99



Titanic:..... Over 3 hours to read

Clinton:..... Over 3 hours to read



Titanic:..... The story of Jack and Rose, their forbidden love, and subsequent catastrophe.

Clinton:..... The story of Bill and Monica, their forbidden love, and subsequent catastrophe.



Titanic:..... Jack is a starving artist.

Clinton:..... Bill is a bullshit artist.



Titanic:..... In one scene, Jack enjoys a good cigar.

Clinton:..... Ditto for Bill.



Titanic:..... During ordeal, Rose's dress gets ruined.

Clinton:..... Ditto for Monica.



Titanic:..... Jack teaches Rose to spit.

Clinton:..... Let's not go there.



Titanic:..... Rose gets to keep her jewelry.

Clinton:..... Monica's forced to return her gifts.



Titanic:..... Rose remembers Jack for the rest of her life.

Clinton:..... Clinton doesn't remember Jack.



Titanic:..... Rose goes down on a vessel full of seamen.

Clinton:..... Monica...ooh, let's not go there, either.



Titanic:..... Jack surrenders to an icy death.

Clinton:..... Bill goes home to Hilary...basically the same thing.
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Old January 5th, 2006, 12:38 PM   #2
Yuma
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True or not, this is HILARIOUS!!!!!
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I still have a gut feeling Shaq will be better next season (2008/2009) after our docs have a full off season to work their magic on the Big Saguaro!
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Old January 5th, 2006, 02:32 PM   #3
AzCards21
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Quote:
Originally Posted by 40yearfan
Titanic:..... Jack surrenders to an icy death.

Clinton:..... Bill goes home to Hilary...basically the same thing.
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Old January 5th, 2006, 02:36 PM   #4
vince56
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Quote:
Originally Posted by 40yearfan
Titanic:..... Jack surrenders to an icy death.

Clinton:..... Bill goes home to Hilary...basically the same thing.
40, you've got me there. Of all the democrats, she's one I like the least.
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Old January 5th, 2006, 03:01 PM   #5
Ryanwb
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seriously..... wasn't Hillary hot in the early '90s? She totally had it going on
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Old January 5th, 2006, 03:27 PM   #6
AzCards21
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Quote:
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seriously..... wasn't Hillary hot in the early '90s? She totally had it going on
Not really......

Last edited by AzCards21; February 14th, 2006 at 02:56 PM.
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Old January 5th, 2006, 04:01 PM   #7
Pariah
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Quote:
Originally Posted by AzCards21
Not really......
Holy crap! Is she training to be an astronaut in a g-force machine?
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